Sorry it’s been awhile. Time has an awful way of interfering with life. Recently, I have been forced to run earlier in the morning before I have had a chance to fully absorb the news. This does not work out well for me. I can be a slightly thoughtful and emotional person to begin with and for some reason adding running and the news in the morning puts my emotions at their peak.
It seems like it would be a good type of meditation to let your normal running thoughts keep passing you by, but I have a way of paying attention to them. Mostly, with my new early morning runs and news absorption I have experienced a more emotional rage at the world. The oil spill has brought on a sadness for the planet and a lack of understanding of the greed that drives the human race. Arizona’s immigration policy sickens me. The publicity of the murder of the woman in Mexico drives me to wonder why women seem to continue to be the victims.
Then there is the guilt. As the news rolls on and my desire to make the right choices continues I start to feel guilty about things like the amount of money I am spending on my wedding. I see all the other places it could go towards. I don’t think I have an ‘I don’t deserve anything’ complex. And I don’t think I am just young and ignorant about the world.
I just care.
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